Why ego is the enemy

There are many ways through which we can sabotage ourselves and our chances of doing well in life. Most of us are unaware of our toxic traits. In our era, everyone has a voice or thinks to have one courtesy of a few followers, a camera, and a social app. With this new virtual power, it gets into our heads at times. Gone are days when money and fame were the sole determinants of our social hierarchy. With these changing landscapes, chasing careers, education, and other things, there is one way we can pretty much damage our paths. And that is with our ego.

Our ego is subtle. We mostly deny it. No one loves to be told that they have elements of ego. Freud discussed this topic extensively in his theories of psychoanalysis. The truth is, ego defines our character. They are a sum collective of our desires, our ambitions, pride, etc. For a more succinct explanation of Freud’s theories, an online article on id, ego, and superego would be highly beneficial. But it would be useless to discuss ego without its predecessor the id and its other part superego. Note that the modern psychologist’s view of the ego is contemporary. But I will highlight the classic Freudian explanation.

Briefly, Freud explains the id as something without form, instinctive and operating on the principle of pleasure. It’s an impulse that the human thinks should be satisfied immediately. If satisfied, the human is happy and if not, the human becomes miserable. The id is a primary thinking process. It can be illogical, irrational, and is fantasy-oriented. This form of process thinking has no comprehension of objective reality and is wishful in thinking and quite selfish.

The ego is now part of the conscious world. It’s like the id operating from within but coming out as a direct influence of the external world. It’s fantasy or any primitive idea being projected outwardly onto others. If the id is an unconscious horse, the ego becomes the rider, directing it to places he wants it to go. Pretty simple. The ego considers the social realities and norms. When a person thinks, “I cannot be seen in such and such places,” the ego is fully in command and operational. “I don’t go to such low-class restaurants,” The ego is articulating. Understood? I hope so. Like the id, the ego seeks pleasure and avoids pain. 

Now the superego. This incorporates the values and morals of society which are learned from one’s parents and others. The superego functions to control the id’s impulses. It’s like, hey, I’ve learned that sleeping around is bad and killing others is wrong. 

Superego persuades the ego to seek moral perfection. 

Modern psychologists have a more direct explanation of ego. An egotist is someone who dangerously focuses on themselves and disregards everyone else. This is a bit dangerous. And quite selfish. We might not know when our ego takes command of us. But certain cues can leash us back into our senses. If you have any of the following, know that you are an egotist and you need to do something about it.

You can fix yourself.

• You don’t believe you can learn from anyone below you.

You disregard the opinions of anyone you deem below you. This can be from a low-rank worker to a student in a lower class. You believe you have a monopoly on knowledge. “How can a third-year teach me such and such a topic?” The subtle form of this kind of reaction is completely zoning out when your ‘inferior’ is explaining to you a concept that you are not so familiar with. You’d rather go ‘read it for yourself. This is a sick attitude. Fix it.

• You never apologize

You are always right. They always wrong you. Whenever you argue with anyone, you don’t accept your faults. The other party was wrong and you are right, so why should you apologize? You don’t retrospectively look back into your remarks, and you never care whether you were mean or not as long as you were ‘right.’ Well, nobody is right or wrong. Our opinions can vary. There is no ‘right way’ to do things. This concept might be missing from your mind. And that’s why you are so fixated on yourself. If you continue that way, you’ll reach nowhere. Apologize and accept other people’s opinions respectfully. And apologize for your ignorant and selfish remarks. You can fix it.

I hate writing long columns. I’ll be back with more points. You can add in the comment section anything you might have in mind. And I will expound on them later in future articles. The point is, ego is the enemy. If the ego is the horseman and id the horse, we need a superego to tame ourselves.

See you later.